Am alert dating
He may be legitimately finished with his marriage emotionally, but the paperwork isn't final. They may be on a trial separation, seeking variety, or way too fresh from a bad relationship to date seriously.” And if the person is still talking about their ex, that’s a red flag. Another one should be added: When a woman says her children come first, over everything else. However, to me, it means I am going to get stood up a lot; that when I am with someone they aren’t going to give me their undivided attention when we aren’t with her kids; and that a woman isn’t really interested in a relationship and is hiding behind her kids.
What he/she’s looking for: Requiring too much or too little are both red flags. If the person really doesn’t care, they’re probably looking for a “date,” not a relationship, or he or she may be looking to scam you. When I’ve dated women with children, you can’t believe some of the things parents have called me. I used to date a loser who “worshiped” his supposed ex. Thank God I dumped the POS and now I’m dating a decent guy!
But Vondie Lozano, licensed marriage and family therapist, has some other not-so-obvious flags to add to the list.
Self-description: If the user name or headline is weird, overtly sexual or otherwise inappropriate — Bangyourdaddy, 69Reasons — you can stop there, says Trish Mc Dermott, a founding team member of
A couple that is unwilling to get a sitter for a few hours, so that they can be couple is a couple headed toward adultery and/or divorce court.
It is an uncontested fact that children thrive better in marriage-focused marriages than in child-focused marriages.
Also avoid people that disclose too much, whether it’s a recent staph infection, bankruptcy or bad breakup.
And Mc Dermott recommends steering clear of people who don’t have kids but use undue space in their profile soliciting information about the age and sex of your children.
That is why they are divorced most of the time (most divorced men sure as heck are not going to endure that situation with another man’s children). What he was referring to was when someone goes OUT OF THEIR WAY to put that phrase, ‘my kids come first’, in a profile or write it during a conversation (how does that even come up in conversation???
Neuharth also notes that while it’s common for men to want to date women younger than themselves, if there's too much of an age gap, it's a sign he’s probably not looking for an equal partner in the relationship. One had to be held back by other members of his family when he tried to assault me. All I heard was “Queenie” this, and “Queenie” that. From a mother’s perspective, let me give you a reason why I would put my child over a man.
If the person is single, what else would they put in their photos, but their dog, etc? So, I don’t even read profiles that say, “..children will always come first.” I think kids are really cool, but I don’t need to be in a relationship where I will always com second. This is by far not the only one, but it is the easiest to explain.
Sure, the divorce may be the result of an act of adultery committed by the husband, but that was more often than not just a case of a man attempting to obtain the connection has was not getting at home. ) there are HUGE issues there and the person reading it should run for dear life. So there was no need for you to “counter” with “why I would put my child over a man” because he wasn’t arguing that point - you veered off into a completely different direction with your rant.
You’re definitely projecting…which kinda proves MIKW’s point… Matter of fact, the only time it wouldn’t be a red flag is if it was said by some misguided man who thought women would be super duper impressed he wrote it so he could show everyone just how much he loves his kids—which is, again something we hope would be the case, lol.