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I caught myself in the middle of the conversation (phone), and I said okay let’s stop this and call me back in 5 minutes and we’ll just be sweet and on the same team.
He called back and said he wants to break up and it’s become too exhausting for him and he’s not even sure he wants a relationship right now. We are still in touch and very loving and friendly to each other.
Yet, there I was, still talking myself into excusing him, or making the reality of things into my fantasy of what I wished it would be.Eventually, everything changed, and he was talking about commitment and insisting he was my boyfriend, and spending all his time with me and just so happy to have me in his life.He was never the type to be so ‘into’ a woman in his life before, and he made me feel very special. I had a lot of insecurity about being ‘abandoned’ and I nagged, whined, and expected a lot.Go back over your list, and beneath each situation, write down what you “usually” do in that situation.Write down what you’re thinking, what you’re feeling in your heart and your body, and what you say and do when that situation happens3.